Transcription:Unsolved Case Files: I, Rosie
(Del Spooner and Rosie are in a dark room) Del Spooner: Murder is a new trick for a robot, isn't it? Respond. Rosie: I did not murder him. Del Spooner: Must've done something really bad to piss you off? Respond. Rosie: I did NOT murder him. Del Spooner: Or maybe you just hate humans, is that it? Rosie: I DID NOT MURDER HIM! (She bangs her hands in the desk, and her hands make big holes in it. Cops aim their guns at Rosie) Del Spooner: Yeah, right. (Cut to a safe. A hand pulls a file out of the safe, brings it to a desk and stamps it "UNSOLVED CASE FILES", then opens it. It reads: I, ROSIE: THE GEORGE JETSON MURDER".) Narrator: Meet George Jetson, his boy Elroy, daughter Judy, Jane his wife. Their lives have been tarnished by murder. Murder by way of a broken window pane and a fatal fall to the ground below. (Shows outline and hole where George fell surrounded by caution cones and yellow tape. Then to construction worker) Construction Worker: Who floats buildings that high up? I'm asking ya. They put treadmills on the outside of them. You believe that? He could have fallen off one of those things for all we know. Damn! We are stupid in the future! (Cut to Del Spooner looking down from broken window pane from the Jetson residence) Announcer: One detective knew it was no accident. Del Spooner: 'Don't you realize this is safety glass? It would have taken a robot to... ''(Spooner takes a chair and tries to smash the window to prove it won't break easily, but instead the window breaks like normal glass with Spooner saying "oh god" as he and the chair falls through. Spooner's Converse shoe catches on the broken window and falls to the floor. Close up of the shoe with the words "Antique" Converse Sneaker! On Sale Now, Viewers! blinks multiple times on the screen with a dinging sound) '''Announcer: One man would speak out for Rosie's innocence. (Cut to Mr. Spacely watching Rosie's interrogation in his office) Mr. Spacely: Ridiculous! My robots are harmless. With the three laws of robotics, the things have to do anything we tell them. Now if you'll excuse me, it's time for my sponge bath. Come along, Retard. Retard the Robot: Bidi-bidi-bidi-bidi. Somebody kill me. Announcer: '''And what of the other victims in this unsolved crime? The family of the deceased? '''Elroy: It's not so bad. I got a new dad and everything. (Mr. Spacely sits with Jane in his lap while smoking a cigar) Mr. Spacely: Time to go to your room, kid. Astro: Rey! Ret Rour Rands Roff Rer! (Hey, get your hands off her!) Mr. Spacely: I don't know what you said, but I'm pretty sure it's something people get neutered for. (Astro lets out a yelp and walks away sadly to where his food dish is, lays down and pees the floor making a giant puddle) (Cut to alley with graffiti on the door and walls with a dumpster nearby) Announcer: The family hasn't seen much of Judy Jetson recently. Judy: Dad's dead and now I'm in this alley and I have no... (The door opens suddenly and the chinese resturant guy grabs Judy and brings her inside. She lets out a small scream before the door closes.) (Cut to Mr. Cogswell sitting at his desk) Mr. Cogswell: C'mon! Of course Rosie did it! Those three laws are full of crap, ya know! She was built to keep the place clean, but he always kept it messy. She probably killed him to make sure the place wouldn't get dirty. (George Jetson has been eating throughout Mr. Cogswell speaking and has been throwing the left over drumsticks behind him messing up the walls. Rosie walks behind George and smashes his head between her two hands, killing him.) Mr. Cogswell: How do I know this? Because I too am a robot! (sings robot song while doing the robot dance) Robot! (Cut to picture of George Jetson) Announcer: 'Who killed George Jetson? ''(Cut to picture of Mr. Spacely) '''Announcer: Big business man gone bad? (Cut to picture of Astro) Announcer: That pissing dog? (Cut to picture of Rosie) Announcer: Or was it truly the soulless metal housekeeper? (Cut to Rosie in court making her defense statement) Rosie: I really didn't murder Mr. J, you know? Judge: Perhaps, but just to be safe... (Judge pulls a lever making two metal smashers come together with Rosie in the middle, crushing her completely. They lift up and spare parts with oil sticking to the smashers is all that is left of Rosie.) (Cut to picture of Jem covering her face with her arms) Announcer: Next time on Unsolved Case Files: Jem. Was she truly outrageous? Truly, truly, truly outrageous? (Jem stands at a urinal peeing. She turns to look at the camera, then turns back to the wall and continues peeing.) Category:Transcriptions